It seems silly to write a post about this. After all, why do we need reasons to be nice to each other? The reality is that we often look at another girl as a competitor for male attention, for success, or for popularity.
And you know, I understand the feelings that we so often get when we see another girl killing it. I know how easy it is to see someone’s success or beauty and think less of your own, but you know what?
That’s right, encourage. We, as females, need to be better about celebrating the success and happiness of other females. Instead of secretly hating them or being bitter, why not change our hearts and support them?
Here’s the thing: women have a lot of pressure and problems already. Whether or not you are a feminist, there is no denying the pay gap, the pressures of physical perfection, the alarming statistic of domestic violence and sexual abuse (like the fact that 1 in 6 women have been a victim of attempted or completed rape). With so much stress and pressure and scary statistics to follow us around, why should we inflict more issues on other women? It doesn’t make any sense!
This week, I had experienced some comments that made me go: What is the point of it? What is the point of being mean to me and ridiculously critiquing me? It offered no constructive criticism, no help, just meanness. My initial reaction was to fight back, to argue with her that her comment was way out of line. Instead, I swallowed my pride and consciously chose to let it go. There is no point in arguing but there is one in encouraging another girl.
I am making the commitment to myself and to my fellow females to be kinder, to encourage more. That means rooting for the girl that got the promotion over me because that is one more girl shattering the workplace statistics that show that most high level positions are held by men. That means complimenting the girl that looks incredible because she also has days where she feels insecure. And above all that means to look at another girl not as a competitor but as another individual that is not so different from myself.
When you dehumanize girls, when we allow inaccurate media portrayals of back-stabbing, boy-snatching girls to influence our thoughts and feelings towards fellow females, we add another stress and another problem. We need to remember to be kind and to encourage in order to stop the girl-hate and work together to tackle bigger problems.